Monday, March 20, 2006

Friendships Are for Now

I miss my friends. No, not the ‘I’ll-call-you-once-in-a-while’ kind of friends, I have quite a few of those, but the long lasting friendships that are further cemented by each milestone accomplished in life. I have met a lot of people in this town, but I have yet to feel really close to anyone. It seems as if most of the people I have met have a thick shield that guards them from showing their true selves… and I wear my heart on my sleeve. Not that I expect the same, but for some reason, I just never feel people are very genuine. Maybe it’s me. I’m certainly not going to proclaim that I am perfect. Maybe it’s a cultural thing, but given that I am as American as it gets, that’s very unlikely. Maybe it is the fact that I didn’t grow up here, and neither did many of the people I’ve met, so there is no real feeling of belonging, nor a true sense of permanence. Whatever it is, I long for the same kind of friendships I still keep with some of the people whose life I was a part of back home and in Philadelphia.

I worry for my children. I certainly would love for them to have the ability to have great, long-lasting friendships that will last a lifetime. But, as I look around and see just how self-absorbed and dismissive most people are, and how children’s focus is being turned from finding value in themselves to finding worth in the material things they posses, I just can’t help but wonder if the world’s meaning of the word ‘friendship’ is changing and I have just lagged behind. I think there’s been a real shift from what used to be the concept of true friendship: a life sibling of one’s choosing; to shallow relationships lacking a solid base or true connections. It’s the difference between mom’s home made chicken soup and the canned variety: I can still eat the canned soup, but it’s just not as good for the soul.